Women And Hypergamy

What I want to touch on today is how women are always looking to trade up and if you are aware of this you can maintain your frame and never get emotionally exposed when/or if it happens to you.

Rollo Tomassi refers to this as Hypergamy. Where women will settle with a man but always be on the lookout for a man of higher status, looks and physical stature then the one they're with. Women will deny this all day long, but it happens every day in divorce. Especially if the woman married a beta-provider, and not an alpha male.

In his book, The Rational Male he discusses beautifully the stages women go through. I'll dumb it down for you, but when you read this I hope it opens your eyes to a new look on your life and maybe reflect back on how it transpired for you as you got married, and then divorced like me.

Women In Their 20's

At this stage, women are in their sexual prime. They are confident, know they "have it going on", and are looking for alpha males to fuck and have a good time with. Many will have hookups, one-night stands, and crazy sex during this stage. A very common occurrence is these young ladies wanting men a bit older than them. If they are early 20's they are probably looking at late 20's guys. If they are mid to late  20's they are looking for the higher value, 30 year old man.  Hookups and first date sex is more prevalent with this demographic.

Women In Their 30's 

Women in their 30's are starting to realize their sexual market value is dropping and it's time to settle down and find a beta-provider to have a family with. Now I do see in this era more young women being more career driven and independent. These women may not be looking for the beta, but many still are, as they know the alpha will be hard to tie down. Also, women in their 30's are starting to see aging happen with their bodies, and are realizing they can no longer compete with women that are in their 20's with hard bodies, and confidence oozing out of every orifice in their body.

These women know they better find a reliable, financially sound man if they are looking to have children. The alpha is not a good fit for them, so they re-focuse to the beta-provider.

Women In Their 40's

Here is where it gets interesting. Women in this age group (many of them) have begun to raise their children, and the children are now in school, freeing up time for them. At this point, the man has hopefully built up a secure income that has gone up since the marriage (say 10 years ago), so finances are a lot better now.

Let me be clear though. Because it is 2018, there are more women who are working, bringing in an income, and they are much more independent-minded and confident.  

This age bracket of women realizes their SMV (sexual market value) has dropped tremendously and unless they worked very hard to keep their hard-bodies post-pregnancy,  they are not nearly in the physical shape they were in their 20's and even 30's.

Women In Their 50's

This age bracket has got to be tough for women. The ones I've gone out with from the online dating sites like Match.com. They are well past their prime (sexual market value), and yet they yearn to find someone as the clock is ticking. Hypergamy for this age demographic still happens. Online these women still get quite a few low quality, older men hitting them up, so the stay unrealistic with their ideals on the man they desire. Many will be on these sites for years hoping to find "the one".

Most of these women have grown children, which is a huge plus for a 50 and over divorced many like myself, but...and I mean but, most of the ones I've seen are in poor physical shape, to the point of not seeming to care if they look good or not. That does not work for me, as I work my ass off to stay in shape and look 15 years younger than I am.

What that leaves women like this is the older man. Men 60 and beyond. If these ladies are lucky, this man will have some money, abe be tired of the dating scene and be looking for an LTR (long term relationship).

In Conclusion

Hypergamy exists in all the above age demographics, more so in the 30-40 bracket, but even in the 50's and above it does exist. Being an above 50 divorced man, just know this going in.

Share your experiences below in the comments. Let's get this engagement cranking up fast!

Top resource For Divorced Men Over 50


Until next time,
Marco

Comments

  1. Good Topic, well stated. I am 56 went through same shit just 6 years ago. read the rational male Dec 2013.... Life if freaking awesome now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why is life awesome now? What have you done if I can ask. I am 52 just starting out on my red pill

      Delete
    2. Hi John, the red pill journey can be painful, and is often not sought out until a trauma has you in its grips. I was awakens by such a trauma. what I dis was read the rational male in Dec. 2013 4 months after my wife left me. I immediately took aggressive action, hired attorney and private investigator and filed for divorce with all of my ducks in a row. then started intense physical training, got a anti aging rejuvenation doctor. got a new girlfriends that was 34 and dating other young women. I stared living with the 3 prong philosophy of #1 Enjoy life, every moment, every situation. #2 Be the best version of me I can be, day by day. #3 be good to other people, for they do not understand. over time this really has allowed me to "Live The Dream" 6 Months later the Ex wife went into a depression and suicidal over her actions. our grown daughter encourage me to help her. I was feeling so good that I reluctantly did, and with the divorce pending she fired her attorneys and gave me power of attorney. This was a shock, She did not ask for anything. 1 year later and she started dating me along with the others, and she was happy to do so. Today we are together in my frame and she is happy to be there. I am also fully prepared for her to go feral at any moment but the competition anxiety that she feels makes her put a lot of effort into the relationship.
      Not sure any of this helps but make a plan be aggressive and follow through, life will be awesome.

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  2. I am a 50 year old widower, was married 20 years and have tried all the "freebie" sites-Plenty of whales, OKYou Bid, Catholic match, 50+ dating, you name it. I have met many women, had mediocre sex with, and was even in a relationship with one for about 5 months, but most of these women I encountered were single moms, overweight, borderline personality disorder, financially desperate, or a combination of these "qualities". I love women, but the juice has not been worth the squeeze as they say with this age demographic (40-55). Maybe online dating is just not the right forum for what I'm looking for, but really I wonder if I will soon start losing my sex drive as I'm hoping this will be a blessing in disguise. I THINK I want a relationship, but am sick of looking and honestly I'm tired of always being pushed by nature to be on the hunt.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm right with you on this brother. It all seems a waste of time. I have used Richard Coopers recommendations to find a hobby, get in better shape, work on myself. This has helped me a great deal. Reading blogs such as this and anything Rollo cranks out is also a big help. Preparing for the future and a better life. If you want a "10" you damn well better be a "10". Check out George Bruno on Youtube. Lots of personal betterment topics also.

      Delete
  3. Hi Marco
    It sounds like we have a lot in common. I too have discovered Rollo (post divorce) and though I've been evolving deeply since the divorce 10 years ago and raising my daughter 50/50 and starting a new career, I initially wanted to check on your thoughts (that we might approach Rollo with) that menopausal women actually hit a "second wall" where they start to see it's totally downhill and they clamour for a wealthy beta. Alpha only serves as the wallet as there is no sexual drive like it used to be.
    Anyway, we would have lots of stuff to discuss so if you email addy shows up for you, drop me a note and we'll talk and look at a Youtube discussion :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Marco
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  20. Just outstanding...love your blog.
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